It’s been a while. I’m sorry. I have missed this and I have written a thousand of blogs in my head, but I haven’t found/made the time to sit and type. There are many reasons why, but it is ultimately a combination of pain – physically I can’t spend long at the computer before the pain is too much in my arms; lack of discipline – there is always tomorrow and my office is a mess; and a search for balance. Regarding the balance issue, part of my rehabilitation was to accept that I needed to make space for ‘downtime’ when it was ok to do very little. I am still struggling with this. Looking back, the last blog post was when I also launched a new exciting project, bringing the women of Arnhem and beyond together. I see now that this had in turn taken the place of my blogging time. MS isn’t fair and making choices over where to put my energy into is often one of my greatest challenges. But I am working on it. I began blogging so my children would be able to understand me and my parenting experience later in life, and that is why I wish to reinstate it. I’m very sorry for the absence. I missed out on sharing some cracking experiences with you! So, for now, I will look forwards and not backwards. I am working with the mantra: It doesn’t need to be perfect, it just needs to be done!
So, now what? I want to write about my life as a parent. I want to write about my life as a British woman living abroad. I want to write about friendship and support and things that make me smile. I want to write about my boys and their funny habits or people watching on the school playground. I want to write so I feel like I am keeping in touch with people far away. But I also want to use this space to record a bit of myself, whilst I can. Multiple Sclerosis is (hard to spell) a sleeping devil that rises its head to throw you sideways. Diabetes Type 1 is also not exactly a picnic. But they don’t determine who I am. I want to write about me, not about the labels that people attach to me. I am making a promise to you, the reader, and to myself that I will use this space to express myself. If you have topics you want me to explore please get in touch, otherwise I will be boring you all with my ramblings as I sit at my desk with a large coffee and painful left arm (tennis elbow) and right wrist (intersection wrist syndrome…I mean really? Both arms?!!) but I will most certainly be happy that I am back. Happy Spring. The vibes are good.
Love your blogs so it’s great to have you back! Your ‘ramblings’ are why I read and I just want you to write about all the things you said you wanted to write about- so that’s all good!! Big hugs for the pain. Xxx Ps. Going to try to adopt the mantra but bit tricky when one recognised certain OCD traits in oneself!!
Welcome back to blogging. Apparently I haven’t payed anything for at least a year, either. I seem to be getting tennis elbow in my left arm, too. I suspect I spend too much time with my phone in my left hand. Sometimes writing unpublished blog posts. Often it’s easier than turning on my laptop, then waiting absolutely ages for it to load. I’ve just found my password and logged back into WordPress on my phone, too. Now I can actually comment on blogs I read. I’m sorry to hear the MS is causing you so much pain. Does warm weather make it better or not? In any case, finding time to write with a family and everything else is a small miracle at the best of times, so don’t apologise for being away, just celebrate when you do post something!